Confident Parenting

When my wife, Leah, and I found out we were going to be parents, we were both so excited.  My first reaction was one of confidence.  I felt like God had given me the gifts to be a great dad – so I would be a great dad.  So naturally I thought we would be great parents.  Leah on the other hand expressed a number of concerns about becoming new parents, and wanted to be sure that we were as prepared as possible.  At the time I thought she was over reacting – and in my famous phrase – “everything would be fine.”

 

I felt a ton of confidence about becoming new parents – I thought, how hard can it be? As I sit here almost 2 years later – boy was I wrong. Talk about receiving an education!

 

I don’t know nearly as much as I thought I did – and I am in no way an expert on raising kids.  Fortunately, God is gracious and merciful to parents and children alike.  I try to remind the Students in our Ministry of this truth – that their Parents are not experts.  They are just doing their best to be good Parents.

 

Recently I read some material from Jim Burns about becoming a more confident parent.  I wanted to share with you a few things Jim encourages parents to do to boost their confidence.

 

Bless Your Children

Kids love praise from their parents and I’m convinced that they crave it. For children,there is no substitute for receiving a blessing from Mom and Dad. It will propel them to new heights spiritually, emotionally and relationally as you build their self-image.

 

Overcome Negative Family Patterns

This can be tough if you grew up in a dysfunctional family. Still, you can be part of the “transitional generation” who stops blaming bad behavior from the past as an excuse for bad parenting today. Get help to heal the hurts of your childhood and start setting healthy examples for your own kids.

 

Create a Grace-Filled Home

If the atmosphere of your home is negative or threatening, your kids will find somewhere to hang out where they feel welcome. Creating a welcoming atmosphere at home means increasing the flow of acceptance and grace.

 

Communicate with A.W.E.

A healthy dose of A.W.E. (Affection, Warmth and Encouragement) works wonders with kids. You don’t have to be a pushover parent; in fact, leniency does not equal love. But when you are fair, firm and consistent with A.W.E.-filled discipline in your home, you’ll build a stronger bond with your kids.

 

Raise Kids Who Love God and Themselves

The key is respect. When kids are taught the value of obeying their parents, honoring and respecting God is easy. Obedience makes it easier to establish a loving relationship with Him. Give your kids the gift of learning self-respect as well, which is one of the best gifts an adolescent will ever receive!

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These five things are something that we are working on in our home.  We hope that it will help you and your family as you continue to do the best you can.  Remember you are not in this alone.  You have a great number of people who are going through the same things you are.  Trust that God has put the right people in your life and that He will always be right be your side – as you continue to try and raise your children to follow Him.