A Profound Mystery

 

This month at PCC we have been talking about a “Profound Mystery”. 

 

We have been digging deeper into the scriptures to try and understand what God has to say about marriage.

 

Throughout the scriptures marriage is used as an example of the kind of relationship God wants to have with His church.  When we look at the state of marriage in our culture today – that might not give you the greatest impression, but as the Apostle Paul states marriage and the relationship between Christ and His church is a Profound Mystery.

 

There are many things that are powerful about the marriage relationship.  You might even wonder why I would be discussing marriage on the Student Ministries blog.  Well the reality is whether or not you discuss marriage with your kids, they are learning about it… by the example you set. Your actions—both good and bad—are always teaching your kids.

 

Here are 10 things that kids can observe from your marriage:

 

1. Affection:  Kids notice the smallest expressions of affection.  They see dad holding their mom’s hand, hugging, kissing, and cuddling.  They also notice the lack of affection.

 

2. Saying “I’m sorry”:   It’s important as parents to learn to be quick to use this phrase.  Owning our own faults instead of pointing out others is an invaluable trait to model to our kids.

 

3. Affirmation: This should be our primary love language.  It needs to be so easy for us to dish out encouraging words. Our kids hear us affirming one another.

 

4. Attraction:  It’s so important to let it be known in your family that you find your spouse attractive.  It’s a good thing to say, “Isn’t your mom hot?”  It will be awkward, they will laugh, but they will also know you believe it.

 

5. Time:  Your kids should know that you like to spend time together.  When they see you steal time away to sit in the backyard and talk, or go on a date night, it’s a good message for them to see.

 

6. Laughter:  It’s important to laugh a lot in your house.  It’s great for kids to see that your spouse make you laugh and brings joy to your life.

 

7. Respect:  Kids see respect when you open a door for her, when each of you say “thank you” and “please” to one another, and when they observe how you resolve  conflict.

 

8. Faith conversations: Your kids hear and see your faith conversations and know that talking about Jesus and what it means to be His follower is a huge part of your life together.  If you are neglecting this – know that nothing bad will come from talking about your faith with your kids.

 

9. The value of friends: Your kids have friends that they want to spend time with.  Having friends over is a great opportunity to let it be known that your house is a regular hangout for some incredible and cherished friends and how much these people mean to you.

 

10. Servanthood: When you ask one another, “How can I help?” your kids are learning that, in marriage, serving one another often appears in the little things of life.

 

It’s the small things in your ever day life and marriage that can make a huge difference in the life of your son or daughter.  When you make an effort to model these types of things in your day to day life, you will understand what Paul meant by Profound Mystery … 

All of the sudden things will start to change – and little by little you will see what God meant about the kind of love He has for the Church.

Under Pressure ?

Recently our Jr. High students began a series called - "Under Pressure".  In this series we are looking at what God's word has to say about dealing with all of the pressures the students deal with today. 

At first you might wonder - what possibly could have middle school and High school students stressed out.  The truth is there are a lot of things that really stress students out in today's culture.
 


On the outside, most of them seem happy-go-lucky, but inside each student is a complex network of potentially explosive pressures. Students with a strong parental and social support system are the least likely to experience the painful effects of the pressures they face.
 

When parents become aware of the typical sources of pressure that kids face, they are better able to provide their kids encouragement and support. Here are five common pressures that students face:
 

1.      The Pressure to be Perfect.

Students repeatedly talk about their parents wanting them to be perfect, particularly in in the areas of behavior and school. No kid is perfect and when they fall short of their parents’ expectations, they feel more pressure.
 

2.      The Pressure to Succeed.

The pressure to succeed elicits the attitude that life is a constant performance. To fail is to feel stupid.  When students fail, they fear that others will reject them.

 

3.      The Pressure to Conform.

Students find it extremely uncomfortable to be different from their peers; so, they work hard to fit in and accepted by one of the subcultures on their school campus.
 

4.      The Pressure from Body Changes.

Since consistent change is part of the developing adolescent body, teenagers are in a continual state of stress over what’s happening or what’s not happening.
 

5.      The Pressure from Emotions.

Adolescence is a time of emotional development. For many students, the strength and frequency of their emotions is much like having new emotions altogether. They are often not sure where the emotions have come from, and they are equally unsure what to do with them.


Dealing with pressure is tough for anyone – but one of the first steps into handling it in the right way so to know that pressure is simply going to be part of the adolescent experience.   Learning to process pressure and stress is actually  an important part of preparing kids to face the pressures and stresses of adulthood.
 

Rather than trying to get rid of all pressure, the wise course for parents is to help students manage the pressures they face so that they do not become overwhelmed as they journey toward adulthood.

The prophet Isaiah gives us great advice reminding us about how God would have us deal with stress and pressure:

 “ ²⁸ Do you not know?  Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.

²⁹ He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  ³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,  and young men stumble and fall;  

³¹ but those who hope in the Lord   will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles;     they will run and not grow weary,     they will walk and not be faint.”

-Isaiah 40:28-31